This week I meet Larry Birdman, who is something of a celebrity in Foon. He is the commissioner of the Foon Mittens League, whatever that is. I hope he’s nicer than Flower.


Arnie: Arnie Niekamp
Chunt: Adal Rifai
Usidore: Matt Young
Larry Birdman: Rush Howell
Burger King Guy: Max Temkin
Mysterious Man: Tim Sniffen

Producers: Arnie Niekamp, Evan Jacover, Ryan DiGiorgi
Editor: Ryan DiGiorgi
Theme Music: Andy Poland
Magic Tavern Logo: Allard Laban

Sponsored by: Basecamp via The Chicago Podcast Cooperative


Diane · October 22, 2015 at 1:11 am

It’s so funny how Arnie is almost always trying not to laugh. So, Flower is actually part of a sport? Hahah, no wonder she’s always being moved.

LD · February 4, 2016 at 10:51 pm

Awww, I liked the first one best! I was really enjoying discovering a new world, and the blatantly obvious parallels in this podcast are making it difficult to suspend my disbelief 🙁 But this one was still pretty funny.

Sherpico · March 26, 2016 at 9:43 am

I reeeeeally want a Hogface Poisoned Blades t-shirt

Mike B. · May 2, 2016 at 2:27 am

So far, Usidore is my favorite character, yet, Tom-the cock tickler episode had me cry’n!!!
“Lawrence takes his fingers & tickles a cock”!
Plus how Usidore keeps yelling in the background, pfffft!
Pretty funny!

William T · October 25, 2016 at 8:14 pm

Disclaimer, I am a huge nerd,

Larry Birdman claims that 74% of all of Foon watched the Mittens Super Cavalcade. This consists of 91% of males, 82% of females, and 38% of the creatures. Let’s assume the male female ratio is approximately 1:1 and that they are only counting sentient beings. We get 38% of creatures (C) and 86.5% of non-creatures (N) watching. We can calculate that .38C+.865N=.74(N+C) > 125N=360C > N=2.88C. This means that there are 2.88 times as many non-creatures on Foon as creatures. To get an idea of the demographics we have to ask ourselves what constitutes a creature? Is a creature anything non-human? If so that means that all of the elves, dwarves, wizards, goblins, orcs, ogres, changlings, manticores, dragons and what ever other sentient creatures live on Foon are outnumbered by humans a little less than 3 to 1. This seems to be a massive human population considering all of the possible populations that fall into the creature category. Could humans conquer all of Foon? With 3/4 of the population they could control roughly 3/4 of the resources. This would be roughly equal to the United States trying to conquer a world consisting of only a few dozen nations the size and power of New Zealand or Algeria. What if creature simply means non-gendered entities since they’d be neither male nor female? One, this would make the use of the term creature extremely rude. Two, That seems to be a large non-gendered population. Now my two other assumptions could be wrong, but this would lead to even more confusing questions. Where do we draw the line between creatures and non-creatures? Do elves count, but not wizards? Dwarves, but not goblins? Additionally this number, 2.88, could be tweaked slightly if the gender ratio is far from 1:1, but the adjustment would have to be relatively small regardless of the ratio change (still between 2.12 and 4.50). Also, if that is the case, why is the gender ratio so far off? What would lead to the population of either men or women to be so small that it were statistically insignificant?

ashley M hardinger · August 6, 2017 at 3:11 pm

this is greattt

DJ KWI$$ · March 12, 2018 at 6:39 pm

Shit, I just realized that you guys dropped that whole wizard state joke in the later episodes. I never thought you over did it USIDORE>GETBACKINTHEWIZARDSTATE

    William Tresch · March 13, 2018 at 3:20 pm


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