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Hello from the Magic Tavern
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Hello from the Magic Tavern

Episodes

Hello from the Magic Tavern
  • Home/
  • The Podcast/
    • Episodes
    • Bonus Content
  • Community/
    • Patreon
    • Wiki
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  • Merchandise/
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  • Contact/

Episodes


October 05, 2025

Season 5, Ep 74 - Monster Under the Bed (w/ Lauren Lapkus)

October 05, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 74 - Monster Under the Bed (w/ Lauren Lapkus)

Arnie has a monster living under his bed named Grumby that wants to crawl into his mouth.

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October 05, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
The Ruffled Feather, Maw Yeah Baby, Thinking About My Mom, Back Burner, Mastar, So Tired, Undiagnosed Sleep Apnea, Pizza Party, Carry Table, This Very Table, Butt Ass Donger, Squeaky Spring, I'm a Spring, Licked Your Feet, Grumby, Ubmon, Under the Bed Monster, Old Magazine, Big-Tittied Elves, BTEs, Magazine Comes to Life, Portal, Dreaming of Chicago, Stuck in the Bean, Easy Mode, Paint Nails, Bottom 40, Dirty Floor Dicks, Giovanni Ribisi, Shrinkums, Martin Short, First Question is Hello, E'er, Inner-self, Smells Like Badger Cum in Here, Spiderman the Piss Camel
September 28, 2025

Season 5, Ep 73 - Aaaaaangus the Artful (w/ Rhett Miller)

September 28, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 73 - Aaaaaangus the Artful (w/ Rhett Miller)

We pay a visit to Grossland, the rundown mansion of Aaaangus the Bard.

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September 28, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
Outdoors, Lured, Candies, Set of Keys, Incredible Weapon, Mansion, Some Holes Are Just Holes, 90 Minute Deep Tissue Scrub, Who Are You Kids?, Fanatic, Aangus the Artful, Bloody Lute, Won't Sing a Song, Grossland, Toilets on Ceilings, Can Burns, Cunning Angus, Silver Wand from Behind, Ken Burns, Gross Mary, Mandolin, Jinx, Dandelions of Winter, Mur, Sorcery, Kiunt, Haunted as Hell, This Machine Kills Wizards, Ghosts, Pissing Straight Up, Murrrr
September 21, 2025

Season 5, Ep 72 - Fluff Bloodpants (w/ Josh Gondelman)

September 21, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 72 - Fluff Bloodpants (w/ Josh Gondelman)

Fluff the Squirrel is back and he has an insatiable thirst for blood.

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September 21, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
The Ruffled Feather, Stuffed Perverts, Jeans Hackman, Now-Dead, Forged These Chains in Life, Sexy Ghost, Save if for a Sexy Ghost, The Bleeding Rose, Incantor, Squirrel, Fluff Bloodpants, On the Lamb, Definitely Allegedly Guilty, Almost Mostly Bones, Amobo, Blood Nut, OJ Simpson, Naked Swords, Gaseous Blood, Chunt for Red October, Amulet, Scorpion Cops, Can't Spell Sweet without Wet, Spaghetti and Meatballs, Bucket Spaghetti Wednesdays, Mouse Shit and Rat Cum, Jonathan Mouseshitz, Clobo, Closer to Bones, Fliff, Fliff Fluff and Daughters, Vampire
September 14, 2025

Season 5, Ep 71 - Super Studs (live from Somerville, MA)

September 14, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 71 - Super Studs (live from Somerville, MA)

Usidore uses magic to summon items from Earth that are both wondrous and annoying. Recorded live at Arts at the Armory in Somerville, MA on July 18 2025.

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September 14, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
LIVE!, 10 Years Ago, Irving and Clark, Burger King, The Impish Armory, Get Wet, Sleep On Top of Usidore, Red Socks, Horse Butt Stickers, Rumper Stickers, Pajama Pants, VW Bug, Get Bumped, Beatles is Bugs, AMY!, Stray Hair, Stools, Anus Stools, BOYS NIGHT!, Boys' Night!, Earth Stuff, Friend's Pube, Doritos, Super Studs, You Put the U in STDs, Teddy, Petey Pervert, Assarole, Skibidi Toilet
September 07, 2025

Season 5, Ep 70 - Shopping

September 07, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 70 - Shopping

A shopping trip in Hogsface leads to a shocking run-in with someone we won't reveal in the episode description.

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September 07, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
4th Wall, Mysterious Man, Shop, Hogsface, Flower Shop, Bitsy, Bleeding Rose, Window Shopping, Sock Garters, Called in Sick, Seven Gold, Success Begins with "U", Mannequin, Taffy Pulling Vat, Pulling My Taffy, Ta Ta Ta-Ti, Capes, Fridge Cigarette, Podcast Episode, Reality Reflecting Sign, Bitsy Bangles, Sniffany, Gathered Robes, Laser Gun, Employee of the Month Plaque, Stuffed Perverts, Play, Stage Read, Hobby Horse, Jeans Hackman
August 31, 2025

Season 5, Ep 69 - Automa-Tawny the Automaton Townie (w/ Tawny Newsome)

August 31, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 69 - Automa-Tawny the Automaton Townie (w/ Tawny Newsome)

Automa-Tawny the Automaton Townie is a clockwork robot that's a local in every town. She was also the winner of this year's March Magic bracket of powerful magic user despite little to no evidence of magical abilities.

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August 31, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
Aw Yeah Bubbee, Dirty Dancing, Nintendo Power, Automa-Tawny the Automaton Townie, Sacred Promise, Tom-Tom Bom-Bom, Mechanical, Traveling Towney, Womb Lattes, Executive Function, Riversplat, Feather Dildo, Jeff Bridges, Spicy Milks, Loose Liquids, Flammable, Ghost, Ghost Papers, Haunting is a Crime?, Merick
August 24, 2025

Season 5, Ep 68 - Honk if You're Hungry (w/ Ross Kimball)

August 24, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 68 - Honk if You're Hungry (w/ Ross Kimball)

Honk the Assassin is back and you won't believe what he's... okay, fine, he's trying to kill Arnie.

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August 24, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
Chunt Announcements, King's Juice, Geese, Slides Across Table, Great Honk of Terr'akkas, Starting Slow, Bing Honk, Panini, Assassin, Tiny Saber Knife, King Belaroth, Vial of Poison, Joke Fingers, Bale of Hay, Christian Bale, Banner and Cake, 420000 Gold, Stunts, Creed, New Beginning, Drop Kick, Goose Blood, Goosidore, Goose with a Wizard Hat, Bent Over Tree with a Raptor's Tail
August 17, 2025

Season 5, Ep 67 - Five Finger Wolf Man (w/ Ify Nwadiwe)

August 17, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 67 - Five Finger Wolf Man (w/ Ify Nwadiwe)

Five Finger Wolfman, the gambler-turned-werewolf, has a new plan to eat a grandma.

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August 17, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
Ka'Ching Bong, Got a Fucking Job, Lynx'd In, Spells, Gud at Magic?, Five Finger Flint Gustoon, Five Finger Wolf Man, Scoop Boopy, Wolf Services, The Howls Always Win, Betting, Bet, Gambling, King of Wishful Thinking, Regional Wizards, Chaos Soul Stone, Velvet Muumuu, Hot Grandma, Eat the Rich, Five Finger Wolf Grandma, The Great Gatsby, 20s and 30s, Little Red Riding Hood, Hot-ogenarian, Bernice
August 10, 2025

Season 5, Ep 66 - Windsprinkle Now (w/ Peter Sagal)

August 10, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 66 - Windsprinkle Now (w/ Peter Sagal)

Windsprinkle the Unicorn is back to apologize for his terrible behavior in the past and share some new bad ideas for the future.

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August 10, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
The Ruffled Feather, Grapes the Goat, Names Have Grape Power, Fistful of Bees, Franchising, Unicore, Windsprinkle, Big Guy, How ARE You?, Butts and Boobs, AA, Asses Anonymous, Shocking Revelations, Addicted to Oats, Big Oat, Oat Propaganda, Feeling One's Oats, THAT Guy, Unicorn's Blood, Recovery, MFHA, Make Foon Happy Again, Rat Race, RFK, Elfstein's Float Logs, WiFi, WiFi Newsletter
August 03, 2025

Season 5, Ep 65 - Tom the Memory (w/Steve Waltien live from NYC)

August 03, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 65 - Tom the Memory (w/Steve Waltien live from NYC)

Usidore summons a version of Tomblain Belaroth from before he was a king and before he wanted to kill Arnie. Recorded live in New York City at the City Winery.

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August 03, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
LIVE, City Winery, New York City, The Flogging Pig, Who's a Baby?, Aw Yeah Baby, Pink Polo, Pink Shirt, Cousin Glen, Badger Cousin, Fog and Pig, Jahzos Chrost, Star Power, Goose Springsteen, The Goss, Mamma Goose, Burlesque Dancer, Take a Ship, Vacation Ship, Love a Map, Mapquest, Tight 5, Tomblain Belaroth, Nursery Rhymes, The Fucking Pig, The Pig Fucker, Prince - NOT King, King Albain Belaroth, Back to the Future, Robot Arm, OSOWC, ADHD Medication, A Diarrhea Huge Diarrhea, Predictions, Play, Cock Ticklers, Ghosts, The Ghost Fucker, Shut Up Mildren I Wish You Were Smarter
July 27, 2025

Season 5, Ep 64 - Flower's Bar (w/ Brooke Breit)

July 27, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 64 - Flower's Bar (w/ Brooke Breit)

We return to the tavern the Ruffled Feather, on the outskirts of Hogsface, and its new owner is Flower the talking flower.

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July 27, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
The Ruffled Feather, Goat, Grapes, Grape Nuts, Verisimilitude, Principal Vibes, Verisimilitude Minotaur, Vermilion Minotaur, Hogsface, B&D, Flower, Macho Mantis Randy Mantis, Don't Fuck Where You Fight, Loose Knives, Seedier, Proprietors, All Our Taverns Are Somewhere, Clovis, Bridge Troll, Flower's Birthday, Cake Farts, McShingleshane Forest, Taverns Shit-Holes and Bars, Druid Fieri, Donkey Sorcerer, Off-the-Chain, Frosted Petals, Pubes, Mush, Gabagoose, Usifours, Richard Wealthy, Tuxshorto, Tuxkneedo, Ducks, Caball'on Valentin, Slurp Machine
July 20, 2025

Season 5, Ep 63 - Bridge Troll Now (w/ Padraic Connelly)

July 20, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 63 - Bridge Troll Now (w/ Padraic Connelly)

Returning to Hogsface means crossing the Ashit Bridge and dealing with Clovis the bridge troll.

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July 20, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
On the Road, Camelin' Up, Spiderman, Spiderman the Piss Camel, Burn Camel, Arson Arnie, Clever Chunt, Underwear Usidore, Ashit Bridge, Clovis, 6 Years, Mr. The Wizard, QR Code, Riddles, Quizzes and Riddles, Bit Coin, Pencil Pusher, Grapes, Medical Dramas, Lifeline, Gameshow, Bruce the Sky God, Colorblind, Cousin Mark, Uncle Jeffrey, Bridget, Magical Horse, Mark the Bridge Troll, Singing, Penelope, Xgloxcic, Family Bridge
July 13, 2025

Season 5, Ep 62 - Familiar Rescuer (w/ Holly Conrad)

July 13, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 62 - Familiar Rescuer (w/ Holly Conrad)

Aggie Thistlefield runs a rescue shelter for difficult to handle animal familiars.

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July 13, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
Hogsface, The Dumb Pig, Blame Usidore, Pinky Promise, Tomorrow Salad, Pinky Clinkys, Pinky Ring, Jyn'Leeviyah the Red, Silver Lightning, Bronze Lightning, Horse That Got Hit By Lightning, Bowlegged, Puddle, Gnome, Familiar Action Rescue Team, FART, Trough, Pears Before Wine, Southern Gnome, Familiars, Carson Daly, Spider on Head, Mr. Tonks, Gorilla, Classic Gorilla, Rival Wizards, Whale Familiar, Manticore, Ooze, Sanctuary, 5 Gold, Nightmare, Baby Baba Yaga, Upside Down Camel, Pee Camel, Spiderman
July 06, 2025

Patreon Unlock: Boys Night: Camping

July 06, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Patreon Unlock: Boys Night: Camping

Enjoy this unlocked bonus episode from our Patreon! Usidore, Chunt, and Arnie head to the woods for some rest and relaxation.

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July 06, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
June 29, 2025

Patreon Unlock: Shadow City: Season 3, Ep 1: Trouble in Tinseltown (w/ Anthony Burch)

June 29, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Patreon Unlock: Shadow City: Season 3, Ep 1: Trouble in Tinseltown (w/ Anthony Burch)

Enjoy this unlocked bonus episode from our Patreon! Crusher, Punches, and Ma are on prisoners on a chain gang and the only way out? Time travel!

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June 29, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
June 22, 2025

Season 5, Ep 61 - Mailmanmen (w/ John Hartman)

June 22, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 61 - Mailmanmen (w/ John Hartman)

Sendor Mailmanmen is a mailman with no magical powers but a troubling curse.

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June 22, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
Lost, Aw Yeah Baby, The Dumb Pig, Troughs, Apples Bobbing, The Trough Titty, The Topless Tower, The Animal War, New Purpose, Compass Spell, Troughy Wife, Quick Change, Pig Costume, Chunt the Pig, Mail Call, The Atroughity of War, Strong Guy Island, Jewish, Mail Simp, Barely 45, Drenched Wenches, Headline, Challenger Cart, White Bronco, Open Mail, Letter to My Father, Revenge, Naroleprachaun, Hot Troughee, Duke of Gumpleschpit
June 15, 2025

Season 5, Ep 60 - Abomination (w/ Sandeep Parikh)

June 15, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 60 - Abomination (w/ Sandeep Parikh)

Salkataur the Abomination was created to destroy a demon king. But what does he do now?

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June 15, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
Ravine, Remarkable Ravine, Talking Badger, Not a Shapeshifter, Starmor, Metal Skeleton, Wolverine, Shapeshift Hair, Roll Down Hill, Incline, Pimpstachio, Giant Thing, Crazy Looking Thing, Great Legs, So Much Backstory, Abomination, Potpourri, Double Portmanteau, One Purpose, Demon King, Bowling with Skulls, Taste Hoof
June 08, 2025

Season 5, Ep 59 - Extraordinary Boris (w/ Kyle Bethea)

June 08, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 59 - Extraordinary Boris (w/ Kyle Bethea)

Extraordinary Boris, the ruler of the land animals, has summoned Chunt and demands he give up his shapeshifting abilities. Will he?

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June 08, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
10 Years and a Couple Months, Donkey Egg, Unfertilized, Level of Donkey, Eggs, Man Egg, Donkey Scale, Donkey King, Remarkable Ravine, Wizdom, My Wizard Wrote a Porno, Moose, Extraordinary Boris, Weird Branches, Sound the Trumpets, Little Guy, Big-Antler Grab Butt, 10' Moose, 5' 4" Moose, Enchanted Moose, Torture, Moose Highschool, Moose Years, Mousse, Wizard Scum, Cornelius Evazan, Air vs Land vs Sea, Chet, Chet the Baker, Wizard Betrayal, One-Time Lover, Jyn'Leeviyah the Red, Flirting, Yo, Female Moose, Wingman, Boris, Come as a Trio, Monica the Moose, Phosphorescent Moss, Trumpet Corp, Lichen, Moose Congress, Joseph Camel, Smoking, Well Technically, Badger Kingdom, Chunt Propaganda, Talbot, Talbot the Badger, Misha, Both Corys
June 01, 2025

Season 5, Ep 58 - Magic Crow (w/ Aimee Mann)

June 01, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 58 - Magic Crow (w/ Aimee Mann)

We climb to the top of a mountain to ask Radisson Cawthorn, the magical crow, life's most important questions.

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June 01, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
10 Years and Several Months Ago, Skynest, Great Bird in the Sky, Walk to Mordor, Future Lover, Yo!, Yo We Can Just Have Sex, I'm Enjoying the Sex Very Much, Tomorrow Horse, Secret Name, Extraordinary Boris, Caw, Chase Hawk, Intelligence of a 7 Year Old, Bird Sticks, Radisson Cawthorn, Hybrid Crow Raven, Craven, Big Fat Dog-Like Size, Donkey Business, Donkeys Can't Get Pregnant?, A Christmas Carol, Question, Animal War, Poop, Socks and Sandals, Too Many Beards, Marble, Always Hold a Grudge, Hookah
May 25, 2025

Season 5, Ep 57 - Poultice Maker (w/ Chris Grace)

May 25, 2025/ Garrett Schultz
Season 5, Ep 57 - Poultice Maker (w/ Chris Grace)

Prentice Medway, the Poultice Maker, is missing some important ingredients for his magical salves.

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May 25, 2025/ Garrett Schultz/
Dogs are Barking, Pissing and Shitting, Escape Topless Tower, Quickly The Way!, Starting a Church, Tavern, Still Doing This After 10 Years, The Devoted Duck, Devoted Duck, Sticky Thing, Escaped from Prison, Smell of Gruel, Sore Feet, Knee Tops, Arnie Nietops, Too Many Details, Poultice, Elbow Deep in Many a Prince, Layabout, Path of Trevel, Personality Altering Poultice, Lot of Missing Fingers, Green Bean Tip, Chicken Eggs and Oil, Mayonnaise, Every 8th Chicken is Cursed, Suck on the Tip, Morglorbritta, Cloves, Patchouli, Just Be Cool, Green Goblin Egg, Venom Egg, Goblin Mush Eggs, Winterfest
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    • Episodes
    • Bonus Content
  • Community/
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  • Merchandise/
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