Hello from the Magic Tavern
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Hello from the Magic Tavern
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Hello from the Magic Tavern

Episodes

Hello from the Magic Tavern
  • Home/
  • The Podcast/
    • Episodes
    • Bonus Content
  • Community/
    • Patreon
    • Wiki
    • Book club
  • Merchandise/
  • Live Shows/
  • Contact/

Episodes


February 10, 2020

Season 3, Ep 28 - Farmer

February 10, 2020/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 28 - Farmer

Trying to cross a river along with a farmer with a chicken, a fox and three bags of grain.

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February 10, 2020/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Pubes, Book of Sight, True Death, Usidore Dead, Stick Arm, Bowlegged Moose, Scabby, Scarnie, Pierced Brosnan, DDC, Deep Dank Cave, Farmers, Farmer, Devourourer, Crops, Puzzle, Canabyss, Fox Chicken 5 Bags of Grain, Conundrum, 3 Foxes in a Farmer's Suit, Thistle, Hayseeds, Thistle Twizzler, Musical Gnomes, Cake, Industrious Fox, Portrait of a Lady, Classic Earth Riddle, Talking Fox, Talking Chicken, Talking Everything, Oars, Kill the Farmer and Marry His Daughter, Sinsurance, Airplane, Schitt Creek, Out Witted, River Monster, Party Boat, Egg Magic, My Grain, Riddle, Semaphore Waves, Orc Cum's Razor, Herpes Law, Beans, Fields, Susan Doku, University of Phoenix, 3 Farmers in a Chicken Suit, Farmer's Daughter, 2 Traveling Salesmen in a Chicken Suit, Pube Goldberg
February 03, 2020

Season 3, Ep 27 - Flower Parts

February 03, 2020/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 27 - Flower Parts

Flower is back to…do…whatever it is that Flower does. Meanwhile, the Dark Lord’s plot comes to light…

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February 03, 2020/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Gummy Arnie, Gummo, Gummy Baby, Obsidian Sword, Obsidian Doom Blade, Fakeries, Library of Meridanth, Flower, Flower the flower, Cat Hair, Sponge Circle Pizza Pants, Kids Show, Airwolf, Wolf with Bat Wings, Sticky, Stamen and Piston, Pubes, Dirty Books, Book of Sight, Dark Lord, True Death, Rollercoaster, Roller Coaster, Take-Backsies, Bury, Poison Soil, Corn Dog, Swarnie, Mystical Artifacts, Part Horse
January 27, 2020

Season 3, Ep 26 - Scarab

January 27, 2020/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 26 - Scarab

While the boys continue scouring the stacks at the library, Sasha the Scarab comes on the show to find love and someone to eat.

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January 27, 2020/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Snarky SnieSnamp, Gummy Niekamp, Goo Goo, Wry Reynolds, Tomes, Creaky Voice, Scarab, Sasha, Sasha the Scarab, Beetle, Vegan, Smarties Candies, Love, Macho Mantis Randy Mantis, How Die?, Romeo and Juliart, 8'9", Bad Shoot, Check Yourself Before We Resurrect Yourself, Tall Jim, Have You Ever Eaten a Cake?, Hieroglyphics, Drew?, Bloops, Match Maker, Big and Tall Don, Huge Brad, 7 Habits of HUGE People, 5 People in a Skin Suit, Skin is Skin, Eat Flesh, Beetlejuice, Allbirds, Don's House, Master of Wagons, Skin Suit
January 20, 2020

Season 3, Ep 25 - Stinker

January 20, 2020/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 25 - Stinker

The boys, still searching for answers at Library of Meradanth, meet a Stinker who creates odors.

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January 20, 2020/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Library of Meridanth, Library, Gummy Babies, Thumb, Goblins be Nasty, Duck Pimple, Lusty Lion, Snozzleberry, Guntz, Smallest Episode Ever, Stinkers, Juicy, Green Gas, Skunk Fucking a Dog, Dispel Smells, Home Alone, Joints, Common Claw Marriage, Lil' Stinker, Cocaine Smell, Chips, The Lion in Winter, Goo Goo Dolls, Smells, Fair Maiden Smell, Victoria Secretes, Side-Quests, No Mo, Lady Guntz, Magic Tavern: No Mo Babies, Monkey's Paw, Salt and Pepper Chips, Dark Lord, Coke-Libs
January 13, 2020

Season 3, Ep 24 - Tom the Person Reading a Book

January 13, 2020/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 24 - Tom the Person Reading a Book

Chunt and Usidore try to get Arnie interested in the show again when they run into one of their oldest and dearest friends: author and prince, Tomblain Belaroth.

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January 13, 2020/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Tomblain, Reading Rainbow, Dripfang, Bats, Series of Bats, Tomblain Belaroth, Alice P. Corn, Book, Book of Sight, The Silent Eye, Silent Eye Coin, Tiki Cup, 22oz Bitch, Talking Tiko, Library of Meridanth, Hooga, Beggin' to be Drunk, 18 Lizards in My Tummy, Kids' Song, Pewter Mug, This Show Could be Anything, Drink Me, Nook, Essence, Think You Can't Change Your Life I Bat You Can, Recap, HBO, Home Books Office, Succession, Sharing Password, Watchmen, Dis Me Plus, Dark Book Section, Anal Trolls, Let's Hulu Outta Here, Arnie the Book, Queen Titania, Gummy Baby, 22 Page Bitch, Rhiannon, Cow Handjobs, Dumb Book, Gummy Arnie, Baby Arnie, Pages, Loud Room, Quiet Room, quiet room, Pegaseven, Li-mail
January 06, 2020

Season 3, Ep 23 - Hog (w/ Clint McElroy)

January 06, 2020/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 23 - Hog (w/ Clint McElroy)

A small town pig-sherrif-man shakes down the boys.

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January 06, 2020/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
bridge, Charlotte's Web, Eggy Baby, Grease the Palms, Jizzleknob, Frozen in Time, Tiki Cup, Sword in Chest, 22oz Bitch, Tiko, Talking Tiko, Deviated Scepter, Library of Meridanth, Floating Set of Teeth, Chatters, 2 Dongs, Sheriff Jones, Rock the Kibosh, Fiefdom, Festoon, Fiefdom of Festoon, Bridge Over Troubled Water, Frond, Palm Frond, Titles for Your Titles, Simone and Garfinkle, Hamuna Manana, Tit-Rat, Tit-Rat the Tattoo Artist, Werehog, Don Knotts, The Pig Show, Libarry, Liberatce, Brat Pitt, Killing Rats, Rat Burger, Orc, Pearls Before Swine, Toll, My Other Car is a Dead Arnie
December 30, 2019

Season 3, Ep 22 - Witch Smoothies

December 30, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 22 - Witch Smoothies

Claudia the Witch returns, as Chunt and Usidore fight to save Arnie’s life.

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December 30, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Witch, Claudia, Jyn'Leeviyah the Red, Grimfallon, Dead Arnie, Frozen in Time, Temporarily Temporally Frozen, Smoothies, Smoozies, Pet Spider, Eat Me, Stabbed, Tip Frog, Blow Suck Jack, Tiki Cup, Giant Fur Lizard, New Catchphrase, Dukakis, Swamps, Pass Out, Sword in Chest, Drink, Obsidian Sword, Acoustic Set, Smoothie Bar, Blueberry and Greens, Cubby Checker, 22oz Bitch, Woodchuck Day, Tiko, Talking Tiko, Full of Rum, Polyniekamp, Meat Potatoes Parsley, Salad Tomorrow, Ric Flair, Lump of Mush, Bedded 10 Wizards, Shit Rocked, Chooch
December 23, 2019

Winter Solstice Bonus 2019

December 23, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Winter Solstice Bonus 2019

A special holiday song for our wonderful listeners. Enjoy Festival and an Amiable Winter Solstice to All!

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December 23, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Winter Solstice, Song
December 16, 2019

Season 3, Ep 21 - The Lurking Phantom

December 16, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 21 - The Lurking Phantom

The boys finally confront the terrifying entity who has been skulking around the school.

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December 16, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Whispering, Sword, Dripfang, Snakes, Necromancy, Notes, Snaken, Schnenessa, Andre the Giant, Carfoons, Book of Sight, Weapon, Defense Against Art History, Professor's Wardrobe, Simmin, Professor Niekamp, Lurking Phantom, Introvered Nicely to Puppy, Airline Pilot Uniform, Jet Blew a Guy, Airlines, Simmins, Pet Griffin, Loudest Person in Foon, Disney Easter Eggs, Evil Entity, Book on Libertarianism, Common Room, Back to One, Randy Rangoon, Slash Art, Hit Points, Wizard Combat, Metal Shop, Wizard Battle, Venom, Ayn Rand, Arm Rind, Snake Fight, Mortimus Ricktimus
December 09, 2019

Season 3, Ep 20 - Staff Dinner

December 09, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 20 - Staff Dinner

A staff dinner party at Jizzleknob leads to intrigue and romance and lycanthropy.

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December 09, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Singing, Gnome, Werewolf, Party, King of the Wizards, Class It Up, Love, Silent Eye, Figurehead, LIFE, Professor's Wardrobe, Professor Niekamp, Big Stores, Co-Professors, Lurking Phantom, Silent Eye Coin, Usidore the Skunk, Chair March, Sorry My Wife's Over There, Library Assistant, Jet's Son, Mind Demons, Shelf Help Book, Skin Shifter, Meat, Fruit to Meat, Triangle of Opportunity, Slaying Associates, Singcantations, School Song, Truth or Incantation, Gnome Alone, Airplane Pilot, Con Man, Bing
December 02, 2019

Season 3, Ep 19 - Professor's Wardrobe

December 02, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 19 - Professor's Wardrobe

Arnie, Chunt, and Usidore settle in to their new jobs as professors at Jizzleknob Preparatory School for Young Wizards.

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December 02, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Tattoos, KISS, Can, Math, Math Teacher, Eggy Baby, Invisible Hands, Gourdsguard The-Pumpkin Dragon, Vander Village, Jizzleknob, Defense Against Art History, Alone, Professor's Wardrobe, Professor Chunt, Professor the Blue, Pipe, Profestibule, Thunderweist, Can Voice, Jim Carrey, Audit, Ducks, History of Magic, Arcane Fire, Slashed Paintings, FOIL, FUCKOFF, First Underneath Closer Knowledge Over Further Further, 7 Equals 10, Billy Yum Yum Tattoo By Tattoo, Bager School, A Different Time, Balloon, Kitchen Weasels, PA System, Wolves with Bat Wings, Mail, Airwolf, Airwolves, Pegasus Genesis, Simmin, House Cameltoe, Clyde, Skull Moth, Starcat Simmins, Grace Freelme, Scumbawumba Bing Bang, Magic Rock, The Wolf Dead
November 18, 2019

Season 3, Ep 18 - Grounds Keeper

November 18, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 18 - Grounds Keeper

The boys meet up with Can and get a tour from the magical groundskeeper.

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November 18, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Can the Wizard, Drew, Prep-School, Fortnight, Wizards Guild, Back to School, McTruffle Fondue, Friznap Tingle, Jizzleknob, Mages, Mind-Freaks, Secret Mission, Triple Lindy, Young Usidore, Usidore the Blue the Young, Faké Namé, Canopy Nuts, Banjo Poptart, Defense Against Art History, Horse Head on Fish Body, Fintaur, Grounds and Lakes Keeper, East Side Story, Bathelor, Bat Butler, Sorta Pissy, Conan O'Brien, Merman on a Horse, Shack, Lake Dingledong, Cum See-Saw, Candy Cane Forest, Candy Cane Murderer, Andy Cane, Uncle Roy, Douchey Usi, Worms, Douchidore, Frank Castle-Keeper, Fish with a Horse Body, Fish Dicks, Pond's Cum, Bible Goes West
November 15, 2019

Bonus: Behind the Tavern – Brooke Breit and Rush Howell

November 15, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Bonus: Behind the Tavern – Brooke Breit and Rush Howell

This bonus episode from behind the paywall on Stitcher Premium, is a two-for-one! The cast continues their talk about the earliest episodes with Brooke Breit (Flower) and Rush Howell (Larry Birdman).

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November 15, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
November 11, 2019

Season 3, Ep 17 - Candy Shop (w/ Paul Scheer)

November 11, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 17 - Candy Shop (w/ Paul Scheer)

A visit to a quaint candy shop owned by McTruffle Fondue reveals some strange secrets.

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November 11, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Red Potion, Murder, Dark Lord, Owl, Visibility Cloak, Vander Village, Wands, Snow Kissed, Melon Mead, Dramatic Toad, Yelp, Sugar Puss' Candy and Gummy Emporium and Toffee Fudge Factory, Icicle Bicycles, Pretzel Bones, McTruffle Fondue, Cat Paintings, Pudding Pasta, Gummy Babies, Gummy Boy, Friznap Tingle, Teach Cafeteria, Bobbleman Head, Dead Body, Gummy Children, Richard, Mr- Sugar Puss, Pegasus, Copper Bones, Puppets, Baby Fetus, McTruffle Fon-Two, Drupix, Flagon, Tolling for Horse Ass
November 04, 2019

Season 3, Ep 16 - The Wing'd Whale (w/ Zach Reino and Jessica McKenna)

November 04, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 16 - The Wing'd Whale (w/ Zach Reino and Jessica McKenna)

A ride on the mythical Wing’d Whale leads to an encounter with the Freshgrave Twins.

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November 04, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Cheers, Snaken, Schnenessa, Jizzle Knob, House Dingledong, Freshgrave Twins, Cut it Out, Winged Whale, Jessica Wethole, Chronicling, Soul's Hollow, Slayed a Slarvin and it's Slarva, Chad and Beverly, Vwishtash Break, Vwishtash, Beer, Wack Some Smokey Weed, Kids, Sandwich, Commadore Frog's, Boy Sandwich, Drumstring, Sup Pen Pals, Ghost Stuff, Beers!, Wing'd Whale, Gourdsguard The-Pumpkin Dragon, Potions, Herbology, Miced, Mouse Blood, Freak Frag Fry, Dryad, The Text of the Book that has Names, Fatronous, Ghost Foot, Real Chirpinbirds, Trikel Tart at Trikel Time, Growns, Slick Wiz, Down with the Slickness, Boston Common, E-Whales, Nerd Parent, Messages, Back to School, Crush Some BEERS!, Wet Robe Contest, Colomny, Elvis, Elvis Costello
October 28, 2019

Season 3, Ep 15 - Jethro Tull (w/ Andy Daly)

October 28, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 15 - Jethro Tull (w/ Andy Daly)

An evening around a campfire leads to an encounter with a prog rock legend from Earth.

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October 28, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Can the Wizard, Dreams, earth, Scatting, Lil' Squish, Sleep, Jethro Tull, Marshmallows, Morglorb, It's Magic Time, Shit Shower Shave, Intros, S'mores, Saltines, Soul's Hollow, Campfire, Night Sky, Outdoors, Jeans, Sir Ian Anderson, Aqualung, Guytar, Release Waiver, London, Lizzo, WTF with Marc Maron, Aqualoaf, Aqualime, Notebooks, VH1 Storytellers, John Entwistle, Stealing Songs, The Who, Phil Collins, Thick as a Dick, Ian McKellan, Small Business, Handmade Pajamas, Doctor's Orders, Peter Frampton, Cut with Mayonnaise, King of the Rocks, King of the Road, Dummy Canyon
October 21, 2019

Season 3, Ep 14 - Giant Toe (w/ Mary Holland)

October 21, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 14 - Giant Toe (w/ Mary Holland)

Um...we interview a giant toe.

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October 21, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Singing, Twosidore, Stephanie the Boat, Eggy Baby, Bloated Rabbit, Cadaver Falls, Jahzos Chrost, SS Stephanie, Chronicling, Beard, It's a Helluva Town, It's a Real Shit-Hole, Squirt, Giant Toe, Giant's Toe, Big Toe, Lookin' for Love, Derek, Suck a Rat, Social Security, Framily, Dolphin, Porpoise, Vultures Inside Demons Eating Orianniouns, Dating Profile, Ten Feet, Pull the Reins, Family I Chodes, 867-5309, Purpose, Crüd - by Bears
October 18, 2019

Bonus: Earth Games - Clue!

October 18, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Bonus: Earth Games - Clue!

In this bonus episode from Stitcher Premium, the Magic Tavern gang learns to play board games from Earth. This week: Arnie's least favorite: Clue!

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October 18, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
October 14, 2019

Season 3, Ep 13 - Chunt for Red October 5: Executive Hoarders

October 14, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 13 - Chunt for Red October 5: Executive Hoarders

Back on the high seas, Chunt hosts the fifth annual blood drive for vampires. Although blood may not cure the sea creature the hosts encounter.

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October 14, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
blood, Pizza Skull, Cat or Doctor, Dark Lord, Poem, Healing Rock, Getting Nuts, Chunt for Red October, Bears, Eggy Baby, Sea-Mail, Bug Bear, Jessica Wethole's Magical Hair Love, Invisible Hands, C4RO, Usidore da Boo, Hi from the Magic Table, Elvish Lullaby, Smily Face, Roar, Morglorb, Lackluster Lagoon, Chorly, Chorles, Limp, Barnacles, Sea Faring Creature, Half Man Half Amphibian Half Fish, Sub Minion, Chorly's in Charge, Estuaries, Carl's in Charge, Regional Minions, Rodrick, Macklemore, Joanie Loves Chorly, Joanie, Gills, Arousal, Jars of Blood, Wear a Wire, Foonstie River, Biology, Algae, Small Mouth, Kelp! I Need Somebody, Kelp, Dick Bone, Leg Connected to your Penis, Brackish Area, Mike, No Birthdays on Wednesdays, Mustaches, Sea Snail
October 07, 2019

Season 3, Ep 12 - Stowaway (w/ Liam O'Brien of Critical Role)

October 07, 2019/ Garrett Schultz
Season 3, Ep 12 - Stowaway (w/ Liam O'Brien of Critical Role)

A bag of apples hides the halfling runaway Endwhill the Meek.

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October 07, 2019/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Secret Names, Oo, Dripfang, Necromancer, Dripfang LeDespare, Shape Shifter, Tree House, Jyn'Leeviyah the Red, Science, Stephanie the Boat, Dreymenshire, Co-Captains, SS Stephanie, Lil' Petey, Mid-Life Crisis, Jeffy, Jeffrey, Bear Language, Tongue of Bear, Appetizers, Thought Tamales, Bag of Apples, Halfling, Captive, Peapods, Fuck a Duck, Frazgard the Incorrigible, Mandrake Roots, Air Quotes, Send Newts, Monster Mash, Frazgard's Nan, Foonish Language, Bear Necessities, Pig Latin, French-Eagle, Punk'd, Wizard Punks, O'l Rack of Ribs, Skill Sets, Peanut Butter Bag, Bags, Dusty Owls, Sea Water, Nan
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