Hello from the Magic Tavern
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Hello from the Magic Tavern
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Hello from the Magic Tavern

Episodes

Hello from the Magic Tavern
  • Home/
  • The Podcast/
    • Episodes
    • Bonus Content
  • Community/
    • Patreon
    • Wiki
    • Book club
  • Merchandise/
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  • Contact/

Episodes


December 11, 2017

Season 2, Ep 39 - nymbee and Grundle (w/ Paul and Storm)

December 11, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 39 - nymbee and Grundle (w/ Paul and Storm)

Foon’s most famous band is back to play a few more songs before they break up again.

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December 11, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Grundle, Halflings, nymbee, Singing, Song, Dark Lord, Spell, Baby Don't Know, Chu Chu's Chow, Catch Phrases, Elk Head, Decrees, Take a Note, Resting Badger Face, Teenage Dream, Musicians, Bards, Free Hawk, Bus, Tour Cart, Greyhounds, Bung Shui, Pamphlet, Eat Badger, Star Fucker, Hobbits, Brother, Cock Shoe, One to Stock One to Rock, Weapons, Rainbow Sword, Banana Fanana, Hot Mom, Break Up, Elf on the Shelf, Jazz Odyssey, Trampoline, Mick's Dagger, Daggering, Eddie Murphy, Grundle 2, Sheep People, Spanquet, Chuggets, Not Quite Red Floyd
December 04, 2017

Season 2, Ep 38 - Treasure Chest (w/ Travis McElroy)

December 04, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 38 - Treasure Chest (w/ Travis McElroy)

This large treasure chest has just been sitting near our table for years. Let’s open it.

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December 04, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Spell, Gettin' Nuts, Lil' Squish, Darby Barleyfoot, This Very Table, Auto Tuna, Auto Tune, Asterisk, Footnotes, Grugen, Get Wet, Treasure Chest, Grembare, Mimic, Mira Sorvino, Box, Cinnamon Bun, Rubert, Dread Pirate Roberts, Eat Arnie, 2 Buttholes, Questions, Previous Episodes, Not A Chest but a Chest, Doc Box, West Vagina, Clit Forest, Cubert, Ominous McIntyre, Chesticles, MBMBAM, My Brother My Brother and Me, Trunk Club, Summon, Wet Mice, Sweaters, You Might Be a Mimic, Different Tables, O-Talk, Barleyfoots
November 27, 2017

Season 2, Ep 37 - Crone (w/ Janet Varney)

November 27, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 37 - Crone (w/ Janet Varney)

We’re joined by a withered old crone that makes delicious baked goods and steals water.

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November 27, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Mundle the Grundle, stroke, Braidwynn, Elf, Chu Chu's Chow, Wizard Dream, Butt Yay, But Yea, Jock Jams, Earth Handsome, Roxanne, Crone, Usidorable, Scrones, Stealing Water, Crone Ad, Rocky Mountain Oyster, Laugh, In the Bushes, A Band in the 90's, Crone's Disease, Phone, Braveheart, Baker, Bakery, Mel Gibson, To Mel With It, Max is Mad, Straw, Water, Steal Water, Carrot Cards, WD-40
November 20, 2017

Season 2, Ep 36 - Blessed Troll (w/ Dana Gould)

November 20, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 36 - Blessed Troll (w/ Dana Gould)

We’re visited by a troll that has been both blessed and cursed with special powers.

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November 20, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Boys Night, troll, Fire, Cargo Shorts, Cronut, Lil' Squish, Blorth the Brown, Chu Chu's Chow, Wolf Awareness Month, Captain Happenstance, Guards, Trail Off, Sex Dungeon, Have Love, X-Ray Vision, Banging Knees, Briar Wolf, Stockings Full of Bird Eggs, Evil Baby, Pockets Full of Mischief, Erotic Novels, Crystal Goblets, Pile of Tambourines, Old Jed's a Millionaire, Kiss Down Punch Up, Powers, Leathery Nutsack, Kick Out the Jams, Delicious Bread, Band, Jug, Time Enough at Last, Burgess of Meredith, Twilight Zone, Cra-mains, Break Time, Screaming on the Inside
November 13, 2017

Season 2, Ep 35 - New Guy (Live from Brooklyn)

November 13, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 35 - New Guy (Live from Brooklyn)

It’s a busy night in the tavern. We talk to a prolific but cursed bard, a guy who just moved to town with his wife and a beloved old longtime sponsor.

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November 13, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Boys Night, Bungaree Chubbins, Live, Music, Secret Names, Fat Shaggy, Song, technical difficulties witch, Cats, The Great Gatsby, Lil' Squish, 4chan, Brooklyn, SAD Bard, Song A Day, So Much Child Death, Blinded by the Light, Califor, Nia, Oooorrrrruuuuuuuu-sidore, Multiple Personality, Monologue, Big Dogs on the Porch, Jim Gaffiganning, Mario, Demon, Jonathan Mann, Zoink, Whales of Califor, Barth the Human, Badung-Dung, Cannoli, Druid, WB, Shape Shifter, Pionk, Shootin' the Chonch, Thieves, Teens, Stolen Tree, Tree House, Boat, Rotting Wood, Answer the Fucking Question, Ribbing, Magic Feather, Magic Hammer, Classic Barth, Lit, New Guy, Square Donut, David Beckham, Chamber Pots, Apprecibate, Toy Story 2, Barth and Arnie, Barthney, Bert and Ernie, Brooklyn 99
November 06, 2017

Season 2, Ep 34 - Pulcifer the Unassuming (w/ Mike Pesca)

November 06, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 34 - Pulcifer the Unassuming (w/ Mike Pesca)

We’re joined by a very famous guest... or, rather, his father was famous. He seems okay. It’s Pulcifer the Unassuming.

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November 06, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Scholar, Local, Chu Chu's Chow, Nipple Problems, But Yay!, Tomb Tomes, Void, Avoid the Void, Amassadus the Wise, Post-Textual-Textualism, Demons, Co-Existing, Nuttus the Wereboar, Wereboar, Wolf Awareness Month, Wolves, Dick Wolf, Binary, Town of TLC, What Not to Wear, 10/11 Truther, Swing Voter, MGOs, Taint, My Chemical Necromance, Expedient Pandas, Daddy Issues, Juice Boxes Kill People, Pulcifer, Lizard People, False Flag Operation, Take a Knee, Bore Supremacy, Wrist Watch
October 30, 2017

Season 2, Ep 33 - Necromancer Performance Review

October 30, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 33 - Necromancer Performance Review

It’s time to talk to Dripfang the Chef Inquisitor about how evil he is and if he can do his job better.

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October 30, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Mundle the Grundle, Chef Inquisitor, Dripfang, Orcs, Ceiling Dion, Heaps of Beef, Salsa, Chef Cadence, Social Media Manager, Darby Barleyfoot, 2 All Beef Patties, Murder-Orgy, Morgy, Goo Goo Dolls, Fresh Air, Podcasts, FREEDOM!, Fuck Starlings, Head Guard, Awkswome, Streets and Sanitation, Minute Man, Stupid Doofus, Hangover, Hot Bucket of Fuck, 996 Snakes, Compliment Sandwich, Glug Glug Glug, Honor System, In Charge of Hogsface, Dead Troll Hand, Bunch of Bees, Necromancy, Raise the Cemetary, Monologuing, Pet Cemetary, Performance Review, Minutes, Million Minnow, Chuuuuuuuug, Inside Head, Strong Boy, Giant Snake, Down Snake, Cat Crest, Mr- October, Pete the Rose
October 23, 2017

Season 2, Ep 32 - Dark Lord's Birthday Party

October 23, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 32 - Dark Lord's Birthday Party

We sneak into the Dark Lord’s party and mingle amongst his evil partygoers all as part of a plan to kill the Dark Lord.

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October 23, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Baron Ragoon, tannakin, The Void, Witch, Red Potion, Tattoos, Dark Lord, Play it Cool, Twins, Chef Inquisitor, Dripfang, Snakes, bwah bwah bwah bweeeeeeh, Cockroach Clown, Series of Bats, Aprel Füls, Heaps of Beef, Dark Lord's Birthday, Claudia, Social Media Manager, Tomblain Belaroth, Knife, Party, 2 All Beef Patties, Patricia, Be Cool, Blade, Culs-de-Sac, Pooft, Belinda, Squad Ghouls, 2 Beefy Sluts, Baby Act, Sister Act, Amulet, Sir Mixalot, Sheet Cake, Party Boy Robes, Beef Tits, Vomitorium, Suave Answers, Farnch, USDA, Ghosting, Murder-Orgy, Morgy, Barf Stroganoff, Cum First, Tit Mouth, Flaming Yons, Shit-Hammered, Goo Goo Dolls, Sex Maggots, Inky Bottoms, Scooby Doo, Stab, Jump Out Window, Trucidore, The Blade of Veysgo Hallan
October 16, 2017

Season 2, Ep 31 - Bard, Elf and Fortune Teller (Live from Chicago)

October 16, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 31 - Bard, Elf and Fortune Teller (Live from Chicago)

The Tavern is packed with people, including a mysterious bard, DQ the elf and an amateur fortune teller. Also, Usidore conjures images from Arnie’s home: Chicago.

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October 16, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
D'athaniel Quen'yarvin, DQ, Live, Singing, The Dark Lord, Song, treesistance, Shit Standing, Portal, Low Battery, Hamilton, Bard, Get Bit Like a Mother Fucker, Little Child, A Dark Lord, Earth Songs, Light Lords, Random Opportunity the Rapper, Chicago, Festival of Riots, Tavern Background, Doritos, Evil Tower, Trump Tower, Perfect Strangers, Giant Metal Clitoris, Beatles Demon Goat, Organist, Burger King, Dath, Journaling, Kick, The Clap, Fortune Teller, Gypsy, Oh Brother, Borgie, Borg Borg, Swedish Chef, Half-Brother, Quest for Father, Non GIFs, Alcoholism, This Very Table
October 09, 2017

Season 2, Ep 30 - Chunt for Red October 3: The Sum of All Rears

October 09, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 30 - Chunt for Red October 3: The Sum of All Rears

Vampires seem to be avoiding Chunt’s annual blood drive, so instead we interview a werewolf.

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October 09, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
blood, Can the Wizard, vampires, Riddle, Series of Bats, Heaps of Beef, Special Night!, Chunt for Red October, Chip and Bippy, Cad, Potato Head, Lycanthrope, Blood from a Stone, Cad the Vampire, Tail, Goodboy, Teen Wolf, Level 25, Nards, Hairy Skin Balls, Dry Cleaning, Pink Polo, Werewolf, Werewolves of London, Purple Pants, Hangry, Bangry, Port Man Too, Nut Butter, Idiot Wizard, Beat Poetry, 69, Rage, Nathan's Famous Hot Dog, Nathan for You, Penis Under Balls, Nathan Lane, Super Hearing, Otok's Father, Darby Barleyfoot, Knife, Blade of Offense, Blades of Glory, Resident Evil
October 02, 2017

Season 2, Ep 29 - Nymph

October 02, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 29 - Nymph

A Forest Nymph stops by to help spread the word on Nymph Awareness Month. Also... special note for Rusty: stop listening at about 38 minutes in.

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October 02, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Cat or Doctor, Gopher, bwah bwah bwah bweeeeeeh, Riddle, Rusty, Salsa, Chusidore, Cheers, New Norm, Fun Butt Bits, Ballers, Fruit by the Foot, Gway-Ka-Mole-A, Nymph, Professional Podcast, Moustache, Michael Jordan, Nymph Nodes, Nymph Awareness Month, Orgust, Shoes, Booty Call-out, Babs, Grow Tail, Sword of Emeralds, First Kiss, Sixty Hundred, News Company, Newsies, Juicy Gossip, Hpmyn, Banglore, Check, Chips, Three Hundred Hundred, Beep-Beep-Beep Ba-Beep, Foon Manchu, Badger Anus, Read a Piece a Bread
September 25, 2017

Season 2, Ep 28 - Gettin' Nuts (w/ Paul F. Tompkins, Live from Now Hear This in New York)

September 25, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 28 - Gettin' Nuts (w/ Paul F. Tompkins, Live from Now Hear This in New York)

Usidore and Chunt's spin-off podcast is visited by a dapper faun named Mister Chauncey, a series of bats and a talking acorn.

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September 25, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Live, Automaton Constable, Getting Nuts, Series of Bats, 2000th episode, Mister Chauncey, Circuit City, Blue Torch Special, Nut Night, Portalia, Portal, Lion, Season Fouradawire, Saved By A Bell, Beige Witch, Rotten Tomatoes, Ways a Witch might Kill You, Owl Attack, Nuts to Butts, Clip Cloppin’, Ecuador, Guster, Thunder God, United Squirrel Space Realty, USSR, Twirl Squirrel, Girl Squirrel, Y2000, Fucking Nuts, Tomblain Belaroth, Alice P- Corn, Acorn, Racist, Pre-Fall, Spring of Rum, Man Bat Man, Tree in my Butt, Natalie Portman, House of Food, Magic and Shit, Loaf of Bread, Bear Shits in the Woods, Cath-O-Lick, Foon Faun
September 18, 2017

Season 2, Ep 27 - But What About Forever Girl?

September 18, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 27 - But What About Forever Girl?

Eternia the Forever Girl is back to let us know what life is like for her under the Dark Lord's reign. Also, believe it or not, part of the riddle gets solved.

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September 18, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Eternia, Forever Girl, Secret Names, Farting Peach, Ruby, Riddle, Swamps McGee, Basement, Twosidore, Comrade, Chode, Burp, Peach Salsa, Tavern Secrets, Recalling, Hernia, Aged, Jack Rabbit, Not Sees, Eyes Is, Tally Ban, Head of the Year, Blow Job, Horse Mouth, Dildo in a Cave, Stalactite, Prism, New Found Glory, Chasing Amy, Ovulate than Never, Skin Flaps, Four Skins, Salamander Pondu, Groupsie Boarding, Delta, Room that Everyone Shits In, Tough Room, Shit the Bed, Shit Standing, Glass Anus, Spooky, Rats, Automaton, Ruby Slippers, Dick Kiss, Tick Tick Boom, Usidorothy, Spooky Voice, Old Man, Behind a Curtain, Silver Fox, King Irving Burger Clark, Docking, Hello from the Magic Testicle, Terry Gross
September 11, 2017

Season 2, Ep 26 - A Short One

September 11, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 26 - A Short One

I don't know... what if... we did a short one?

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September 11, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Butt Soup, Overalls, Cockroach Clown, Wheel Bear, Twosidore, Haunted Butt-hole, Salsa, Killed the Stark Lord, Backwards, Not at our Best, Glorious Stefan, Deep Voice, Useless Sack of Shit, Marriage, Live Eel, Rodeo King, 8 Seconds, Character Voices, Cracking Up, Bark Lord, Mookie, Polyamorous, Puff of Bees, Under a Blanket, Xylophone, Social Media Manager, Butt-Ghost, Just Talkin' About Butts, Gettin' Butts, Covered in Blood, Stark Lord
September 04, 2017

Season 2, Ep 25 - Sit in a Circle (w/ Todd Barry, Janet Varney, Cole Stratton, Matt Besser & Danielle Schneider, Live from Outside Lands Fest)

September 04, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 25 - Sit in a Circle (w/ Todd Barry, Janet Varney, Cole Stratton, Matt Besser & Danielle Schneider, Live from Outside Lands Fest)

An especially lively night in the tavern with visits from a raven, a warrior elf, an ill child, a giant dwarf and a fairy decorator.

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September 04, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Live, Memory Gremlin, Fairy, Birds, Git-R-Table, Kermit, Raven, Furries, Fleshies, Shut and Drive, Coston Accent, Salsa, Chef Cadence, Messenger, Saloon, Telephone, Braidwynn, Elf, Razor Braid, Hobbies, E-L- Fudge, Sanctimonious the Red, Thundeer, 48379, Sneaky Cobbler, Keebler Elf, Arby's, Shame, Gatorade, Soda, Dew of the Mountain, Doctor's Pecker, Coked-up Koala, Cocaine, Fucking Chocolate Milk, Sourdough Bread, Tang Bread, Kermit's Corner, Timbo, Centaur Herpes, Eternally Ill, Disease Bomb, Chocolate Melk, Yahoo Serious, Gnome McDonald, Matt Dabbin', Giant Dwarf, T-Shirts, Foon Fest, Lord and Apez, I Eat Foon Poon, Rings, Shit Creature, Improv Comedy, Cinnamon, Tumbo?, Jasmine, Decorator, Sprite, Fisherman's Dwarf, Kool-Aid
August 29, 2017

Time Traveling Shills #5

August 29, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Time Traveling Shills #5

The hosts are traveling THROUGH TIME to give you an important message FROM THE FUTURE…about Patreon!

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August 29, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
August 28, 2017

Season 2, Ep 24 - Book Club: The Great Gatsby

August 28, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 24 - Book Club: The Great Gatsby

A wizard, a witch, a badger, a flower, a Chicagoan and a humunculous made of bodily fluids all try to understand the Earth book 'The Great Gatsby.'

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August 28, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Bungaree Chubbins, Flower, Homunculus, Metanoid, mysterious man, Witch, Book Club, Mooping, Snub-nosed Motorboat, Lil' Squish, Chode, Come Chode, F- Scott Fitzgerald, Magic Eye, Crimbletonk, David the Lesser, Scaramouche, Usidore the Talking Wizard, Name Notes, Daisy, Claudia, Blorth the Brown, Racist Overtones, Kindle, Cliff Notes, Swimming Pool, Pink Suit, House Party, Crazy Parties, Pre-Cum, Pre-Party, Parents, Flower Party, Quarter Semen, Naked Party, Banana Dong, Slap Dick, Calvin and Hoobs, Beat On
August 21, 2017

Season 2, Ep 23 - Used Horse Salesman

August 21, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 23 - Used Horse Salesman

Ex-squire Rocky Cocodino is here to sell some lightly used warhorses.

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August 21, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Grimhoof, Horse Party, Mundle the Grundle, Coins, Robot Arnie, Twosidore, Glass Anus Meistar, Lil' Squish, Fart Darkness, Rocky Cocodino, #lilsquishinit, Heaps of Beef, Beef Duty, Dark Lord's Birthday, Chocolate, Hindsight, Horse Sale, Haunted Butt-hole, Salesmen, Pinto, Rocky, Italian Stallion, Ghost, Jeanszo, Trot Control, Mid-sized Butthole, Mare Bags, Lies, Comrade, Trampling, Horse Table, Deep Body Saddle, Portal Tracker, Horse Zone, Blood Changes, Cup Holders, Sound System, Chode, Come Chode
August 14, 2017

Season 2, Ep 22 - Twins

August 14, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 22 - Twins

Jayme and Sayme the creepy twin children of Baron Ragoon are back and stranger than ever. Also, Chunt is trying out some secret names for himself.

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August 14, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Baron Ragoon, Raisins, Gettin' Nuts, Jayme, Sayme, Breakfast Hands, Bronies, Bumble Puss, Kissing, Riddle, The Great Gatsby, Aprel Füls, Fish Years, Snub-nosed Motorboat, Lil' Squish, Context Clues, Skinny Man, Pranks, Rat Shit, Puberty, 4chan, Doll Inside, "You're Next", Dreaming, Little Froggy, Secrets, Nimble Widget, Extracting Memories, Rage Against the Machine, Dream Police, System of a Down, Mankind
August 07, 2017

Season 2, Ep 21 - Gnome

August 07, 2017/ Garrett Schultz
Season 2, Ep 21 - Gnome

We meet a gnome named Aprel and learn several important lessons about friendship.

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August 07, 2017/ Garrett Schultz/
Episodes
Carnival Wilson, Mayonnaise, Book Club, treesistance, Twosidore, Made of Bees, The Great Gatsby, Classic Twosidore, Best Friends, Regular Genitals, Multiple Door Walking Through Spell, Gnome, Fun Milk, Work Milk, 2 Squirrels Tall, Guarding Gnome, Dick Bisque, Hat Sharpening, Prank Bastard, Pane of Glass, Glass Anus Meistar, Sk8er Boi, Blue Collar, Terry the Table Guy, Git-R-Table, Glassic, Tree Cloak, Short Skirt Long Jacket, Cake, Ratatouille, This Butt Fucking Stinks, Homecoming, Spiderman, Table Salad, Aprel Füls, Aprel O'Neil, Ceiling Dion
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